My Thoughts on Skin-Care

Everyday, we are inundated with adverts promoting skin-care products promising to ‘transform’ us or ‘correct’ our skin, as if our natural state is a mistake to run away from as quickly as possible. Treatments for acne-prone skin are advertised alongside models without a single blemish or mark upon their skin, creating the illusion that a certain cream or face wash will completely change the natural basis of your skin. It is ingrained in us that any deviation from ‘perfect’ skin must be relentlessly pursued and hidden from public sight, pouring shame on those of us who dare to feel comfortable in our own skin.

The expressed aim of skin-care brands is to cultivate a culture of perfection in which everyone strives to become an ‘ideal’, regardless of the fact that they have to airbrush models until they look like wax work figures to convey this ‘ideal’ image in their ad campaigns. The vast majority of such products are crammed full of chemicals such as sulfates and parabens, in addition to other chemicals that I cannot spell let alone pronounce. Then we are commonly expected to pay irrationally high prices for the pleasure of possessing these products so that we can smear these chemicals across our face as we chase skin-perfection with ever increasing desperation.

For me, years of longing for my acne to clear and my numerous trials of consistently failing skin-care products has left me very skeptical and resentful of the beauty industry (maybe you can tell!). In my opinion, the narrative around skin-care should focus on nourishment rather than perfection. We should focus on taking care of and protecting our skin which will be ours to the day we die rather than damaging it in the pursuit of perfection at any cost. Our bodies and skin are things to be cherished and appreciated rather than scorned and hated. Yes, skin problems can be painful and annoying to deal with but they are not the sum of who we are and do not warrant us feeling worthless and ashamed. Caring for ourselves rather than constantly criticising is innumerably more rewarding.

‘It is amazing how complete is the delusion that beauty is goodness.’ – Leo Tolstoy

‘Beauty is a radiance that originates from within and comes from inner security and strong character.’ – Jane Seymour

10 Motivational Quotes

  1. ‘The older you get, the more fragile you understand life to be. I think that’s good motivation for getting out of bed joyfully each day.’ – Julia Roberts
  2. ‘Change your life today. Don’t gamble on the future, act now, without delay.’ – Simone De Beauvoir
  3. ‘The secret of getting ahead is getting started.’ – Mark Twain
  4. If you can dream it, you can do it.’ – Walt Disney
  5. ‘I attribute my success to this – I never gave or took any excuse.’ – Florence Nightingale
  6. ‘There is no passion to be found playing small – in settling for a life that is less than the one you are capable of living.’ – Nelson Mandela
  7. Aim for the moon. If you miss, you may hit a star.’ – W Clement Stone
  8. ‘Challenges are gifts that force us to search for a new centre of gravity. Don’t fight them. Just find a new way to stand.’ – Oprah Winfrey
  9. ‘Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm.’ – Ralph Waldo Emerson
  10. ‘If you ever think of giving up, remember why you held on for so long.’ – Hayley Williams (of Paramore)

Self-Care

In my eyes, ideas of self-care have become convoluted paths to luxurious experiences or funnels through which substantial amounts of money are spent which only leads to increased stress in the long-term. For this reason it seems that we have drifted so far away from the fundamental basis of self-care; to create time and space for ourselves in which we can prioritise our health and happiness during which we answer to no-one but our own needs and desires.

Mainstream ideas about self-care have morphed away from prioritising the search for peace and love within ourselves to the prioritisation of material things, such as extortionately priced bath bombs and candles, so that our sessions of self-care will be ‘instagram worthy’. I frustrate myself when I realise that, in my pursuit of self-care experiences, I overlook and disregard the simplest of things which are usually the most enjoyable and rejuvenating:

  • Sitting or reading a book under a tree with the sun shining upon you
  • Dedicating time to reflective journalling so that you can listen to your mind once more
  • Having a solid hour-long yoga session in which you set your practice intention to be calm and ease
  • Cherishing a new bunch of flowers you cultivated in your garden or picked yourself
  • Re-connecting with your all-time favourite book by re-reading it again and embracing the nostalgia which comes with it
  • Changing your bed clothes and sheets so that you can indulge in the experience of clean, crisp material when you go to bed that night

All of these small and simple things are gentle and easy ways to re-energise yourself after you feel ground down by the daily toll of life. When you come to reflect on your efforts at self-care you can appreciate the simplicity you have introduced into your life through that process rather than burdening yourself with superficial extravagance.

‘There is no greatness where there is not simplicity, goodness, and truth’ – Leo Tolstoy

Intuition…

I am an over-thinker. I worry obsessively about upcoming events weeks in advance and I agonise over my inability to control every situation I am in. My social anxiety tells me that any number of wild possibilities could happen if I leave the house or that seemingly innocuous activities could bring me into danger. Everyday my brain whirs with a string of imagined scenarios, all created with the hope that I will keep myself nestled in bed where I will be safe rather than risk pushing my boundaries and challenging myself.

However, recently I have come to realisation; that we all have intuition for a reason. That gut feeling which appears when you are presented with a crossroads in life is not something to be disregarded. Rather than always let your brain take over and over-analyse situations until you end-up missing out on endless opportunities, listen to your natural instincts. Our intuition is an innate feature of being human and can tell us when we are actually in danger or whether we should take an opportunity or not. Best of all, it does not wait around or dither about decisions, it is a natural physical reaction which happens in the moment and can help guide us if we are in two-minds over a decision or situation.

In many ways, humans have come so far away from listening to our guts and trusting in our natural instincts that the norm is now to live on the ultra-cautious side to save ourselves from any potential difficulties in the future. But what if, by doing this, we are actually just stopping ourselves from actually experiencing anything fulfilling or different? After all, if we always live in our bubble, surely we will become claustrophobic and regret all of our missed opportunities and chances? Often we disregard our intuition to save ourselves from any potential embarrassment or failure but this blocks us off from the experiences which will enhance our personal growth and allow us to feel more confident in trusting ourselves.

Our intuition is not something to be viewed with wary scepticism or suspicion. It is a natural part of us that should be embraced rather than curbed by fear or over-caution.

“Belief consists in accepting the affirmations of the soul; unbelief, in denying them.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson

 

5 Steps to Minimalism

Minimalism. The word can conjure intimidating thoughts of incredibly stylish people living in ultra-airy, sleek apartments or an all-or-nothing lifestyle in which you reject absolutely everything that is socially mainstream. For me, I see minimalism as an art. Also, I see minimalism as an art which can be adopted to varying degrees depending on different people’s lifestyles, interests and needs. For example, I strive to be a minimalist but I still have a book collection which spans two bookcases and a good portion of a wardrobe, even though I sincerely doubt that I will ever read many of those books again. However, I don’t believe that this fact should stop me from aligning myself with the minimalist lifestyle because it is my choice which sections of my life I adopt this art form in most.

Here are five important beginners steps towards adopting minimalism which hopefully will seem neither intimidating nor wildly unrealistic:

1. Stop viewing clothes sentimentally

This has been a great stumbling block for me in the past. I have kept clothes and shoes which I had long since grown-out of or were essentially falling apart at the seams simply because I attach particular memories to them. However, this is not a sustainable approach. If I had kept keeping every item of clothing which I linked back to wearing at a particular time in a certain memory I would have had an ever expanding collection of clothing which I would have to haul around with me for the rest of my life and devote a considerable amount of space to, even though I would never have the intention of wearing them again. Also, donating the clothes which you have grown-out of is so much more satisfying then seeing them gather dust in the long abandoned corner of your wardrobe, by giving them away to someone else you are given those items a new lease of life as well as letting someone else enjoy them much more than you were.

2. Identify all of the objects which weigh you down

This is where honesty is crucial. If you want to live a lifestyle which is spontaneous and easy to adapt to new living situations then it is easier in the long-run to pick out which items you own which just are not you anymore. This is not just limited to clothing, it corresponds to all possessions which you do not relate to or identify with anymore and which simply tie you down. It may seem difficult to discard items which you may have been gifted at Christmas a long time ago for instance but it is very likely that such objects were bought for the person you were back then and since you have developed after receiving the gift, it no longer feels personal or relevant to you anymore. Do not let objects or possessions weigh you down!

3. Which objects actually add to your quality of life?

It is a brutal fact that some possessions we have are simply overkill. The majority of us do not need or utilise all of the possessions we have yet we surround ourselves with things which are only marginally useful to us. After a while all of these unnecessary objects can get cumbersome and you will have no space to store things which actually add to your quality of life. In that case, get rid of those things which do not have a positive impact on you or actively help you live and enjoy your life.

4. Which products, if you disposed of them, would make your life simpler?

Taking the example of clothing, if I compare how long it used to take me to get dressed in the morning when I had drawers and a wardrobe overflowing with piles of garments to how long it takes me now when I have condensed my wardrobe, the time I save in the morning is invaluable. I used to agonise endlessly over what to wear, analyse what impression my clothes would give and try to work-out what others might approve of me wearing. However, I am not passionate in any way about fashion. This does not make me better or worse than other people, it’s just a fact, so I chose to simplify my life in this area. I now have a core amount of clothes which I am happy with and comfortable in and rotate them accordingly which saves me time and space, as well as lifting the burden of owning so many clothes which I did not particularly like in the first place but that other people encouraged me to buy so that I would follow trends.

5. What is clutter?

I did not realise how much clutter I owned until I really committed myself to downsizing the amount of possessions I had. I must have owned over a hundred different hairbands and hair accessories in a variety of different colours and shapes from when I had long hair but considering my hair is so short that I couldn’t even tie it up now if I wanted to, that is completely ridiculous! I had kept little toys and figurines which I bought for 50p at car boot sales when I was a kid as well as CDs and DVDs which I had no intention of ever listening to or watching again. Removing all of these superfluous possessions meant that I had room to actually breathe rather than look at my space and sigh in exasperation because it looked like it had been ransacked by a considerably erratic thief!